<3

heythisbegabi @ 2005-03-28T16:54:00

2005-03-28T23:56:28Z

they ruined my best friends day. and that ruins my day. im never liking one again. they all suck. everytime i meet a new boy i think "oh hes cute, hes not gay like the rest of them" and im the dumbest thing on the planet. IM REALLY NOT LIKING ONE EVER AGAIN.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-03-25T09:58:00

2005-03-25T17:00:55Z

I was one of the happiest people in the world for the past week. and yesterday ruined it all.

I'm never liking another boy again. I hate liking people. It's the worst thing in the world. whenever i like someone they never want a relationship. well whats the point in liking someone? and why the heck do you try to get that person to like you, so you can just tell them you don't want a relationship? I don't get it. If you really liked someone, wouldn't you want a relationship? I know I would. That's probably why I'm having so much trouble with this. I hate this.

And; I'm probably the worst person in the world at getting myself to stop liking someone. Whenever I like someone, I can't stop liking them until I hate them. I don't want to hate Geoff. But i don't know how to do thisssss. I suck.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-03-20T13:00:00

2005-03-20T20:18:36Z

This break was wierd. In a good way? So. My vacation to California went wayyy wrong. Not one thing went right. On the way there we stopped in blithe [sp] and when we were getting back on the free way our car started jerking really bad and my whole family was cracking up. We just got our car checked on the same day and they said there was nothing wrong with it. So we keep driving. We stop somewhere else so my mom can pee and when we try to back out of the parking spot. It doesn't move. Our car lost its reverse? So me and ashley back it out, of an uphill parking spot. My car is not small. ITS HUGE. its an excersion. so anyways. we get there at two in the morning, and we were supposed to stay with my cousin. We get there and we don't know which apartment is hers, and she won't answer her phone, so we had to go to a hotel. Then we can't find our room and we are all tired beyond belief. Finally I found it. Then we stay there. The next day we go to Andrea's [my cousin's] and my mom parks in a parking spot that is almost impossible to get out if without reverse. So the next time we are leaving me and ashley and two old chinese men had to push it out. We have pictures. This day went pretty good. I got sunglasses and nothing BAD happend. The next day we get up get ready and walk to venice beach again. but it starts pouring as soon as we get there. so we just shopped in the rain. i got shoes and a skirt. there cute. i also got a henna on my wrist. and so did ashley. the rain smeared them. then we stopped at starbucks and sat there for like ten minutes. and then walked the rest of the way back. then i dried my clothes with a hair dryer cause my cousin cant find her key to the dryer and washer downstairs. then me and ashley cuddled and then fell asleep. Then woke up and ate and texted everyone in ashleys phone book and then went to sleep eventually. My mom took the car to the shop that day and they said it was going to be 3000 dollars. so we were going to go ahead and fix the car, but then they said its going to be more than a week to fix it so we were trying to find a way home. Then the next day we went to venice again. it was pouring on us. AGAIN. so we came home. i have bruises all over my feet from walking. and blisters. so then we end up leaving. we took a taxi to the grey hound station. I'm pretty sure he had a boner, i only looked cause geoff told me to. Then we got to the grey hound station and we were the only white people there. we sat there for three hours. because our bus was late. then we get on the bus. and i sat down in a wet seat. so then my but was itching the whole time. and my seat was broken and wouldn't recline. so i layed on ashley. we sat next to the cutest black boy in the world. his name was devan. he was huggge. i wanted to cuddle with him. that would be so cute. so then we got to phoenix and we rode a taxi home. we were locked out of our house. so then i had to open the window with my toothbrush and climb in it. and then the alarm went off and pretty much blew up my ears. on the trip like 2341651 people asked if me and ashley were twins. and 3 people said i looked like the olsen twins.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-03-16T13:33:00

2005-03-16T20:35:59Z

This break has been fun.

I'm going to california either today or tomorrow?

Last night was cute. Me and Geoff and Chris and Ashley went to the orange grove things and then drove to tempe for no reason and then went to the park. It was fun. Geoff is a really nice boy.

That is it.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-03-01T21:49:00

2005-03-02T04:57:23Z

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-21T13:19:00

2005-02-21T20:38:10Z

If i could have the perfect boy, he wouldn't be very cute. That way everyone wouldn't want him. He would talk to me, even in front of his friends. He wouldn't get embarassed of me, especially when I laugh, he would think my laugh was cute. He would come over to my house and surprise me, we would walk to the park and spider swing everyday. Whenever it would rain he would come get me to play in the rain with him. He would tell me he loved me and that I was beautiful. He wouldn't try to be funny/look cool in front of everyone else. He would NEVER try to get me to do stuff with him that I didnt want to do. He would pick me flowers. If I was sad he would stay with me and try to make me feel better, he wouldn't call me emo. He would pick me up and spin me around when he would give me hugs. He would kiss me on the cheek and play with my hair. We would hang out, just me and him; without other people. We would be hyper together and always have something to talk about. He would call me sometimes, not every night but every now and then. When i was sick he would come see me. He would always call me sweet heart. I would be able to tell him everything. He would never make me feel embarassed. We would be in love.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-20T10:41:00

2005-02-20T17:52:14Z

Last night while everyone was at the concert I went over to chelsea bjerks. chelsea haines and tomas were there. We went to the park and it started raining. Me and Chelsea haines were swinging for a long time and i couldnt feel my legs and my butt was numb but it was alot of fun. We were singing just about every song we knew. Then tomas said he was bored. So we went back to chelsea's. On the way back i stepped in a huge puddle cause it was dark and im blind and i slid like two feet before i fell down on to the sidewalk. I wouldnt have gotten my pants all wet but is started laughing and dropped my knees into the mud. hahaha. then me and chelsea bjerk danced in puddles and stuff. After that we all looked really cute. Thennnn we just sat around and stuff then me and chelsea haines came back to my house. talked to like an hour and then fell asleep. I had fun.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-19T19:00:00

2005-02-20T02:08:28Z

im borrrrrrred.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-17T16:03:00

2005-02-17T23:11:55Z

my mom just told me i look like a freak and i need to do something with my hair and the way i dress.

shes really nice.

today was funny. the best part was when i drew the back of a naked man on lauryns arm. i havent laughed that hard in a long time.

lauryn is really funny.

i wrote dany a note today.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-16T21:32:00

2005-02-17T04:43:36Z

today was umm boring.
in dance i think i broke my toe. its killing me.
english morgan was gone.
math, i had to take a test and i took it in TIMS class.
went to fourth hour lunch. lindsey came toooo what a rebel.
fifth hour lunch. hmm it was quiet we didnt talk much.
sixth hour we had the most awesome subsitute. we just straightened our hair and visited mr. G's class. and got on the computer. I got farthar than ever on jet slalom. go me.
brad was gone in science.

im so tired. i HATE school.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-14T22:05:00

2005-02-15T05:14:59Z

I had a valentine.
It was beau.
Today i went to school. nothing special really happend. chelsea got the biggest balloon in the world. i got picked up early. went to the orthodontist. came home. then went and got candy then went to ashleys. beau came over. and we just hung out. then he had to leave. so then chris and andrea and jordy came over. and i satoutside by myself for thirty minutes. then i finally got home at 8:56.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-13T15:22:00

2005-02-13T22:30:06Z

this week is going to be boring. i can already tellll.
but this up coming weekend. i want to hang out with dany. cause we are going to become good friends im excited. dany is a really neat girl and i feel bad for ever calling her "quiet".

I love ashley. shes the best, best-friend i could ever ask for.

i love chelsea. she has been through alot and understands me.

I love morgan because she is funny and makes me in a good mood no matter waht.

I love kaitlyn because she makes me hyper, and i make her hyper.

I love chelsea bjerk because she is so nice. i dont think ive ever heard her say one mean thing. i wish someone could say that about me.

I love emily because her smile is so cute, and her laugh is contagious.

I love alyssa cause shes always right. shes so smart.

I love beau because hes confusing and weird.

Well i know im forgetting someone really important. lkasdjfoi.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-12T22:51:00

2005-02-13T06:05:27Z

ah. im in the worst mood ever.
people keep making me feel bad about what i do. i cant help how i feel ok!?
there is NO ONE that i can actually just talk to anymore. not even my sister.
I've been really happy lately and all of a sudden im not and i hate it.
I always feel so out of place, idk why. i just ahh hate it.
people need to stop worrying so much about what other people think about them.
and one of the most annoying things you can do, is try to be cute and say stupid stuff, and try to get people to laugh. it really just makes you look like an idiot.

whenever i meet someone new thats really nice im excited and then someone has to come along and ruin it by telling you stories and stuff about them to try and get you to not like them. well you know what?!? i dont care what you think about them! they are nice!! faggot. alksjdfoisgj.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-11T14:41:00

2005-02-11T21:41:55Z

me and ashley stayed home together toooday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIM I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-05T08:33:00

2005-02-05T15:42:47Z

last night was funnn. ashley and me set around till like 10 and then we went to taco bell with emily and morgan. then chris came and got us and we went to some girls house that we didnt know. saw krissy :] then we didnt really know anyone so it was akward. there was this really funny kid. haha. yeahhh. then chris took us back to emilys house. and then i fell asleep watching tv. then they all woke me up and i was soo confused and they were laughing at me. it was weird, i didnt know where i was. hahhaha. then this morning i woke up and ashley was right in my face. it was funny. well. bye.

i love ashley emily and morgan.

ah. i want a valentine. ive never had one. thats sad. i think everyone has had a valentine. other than me.

heythisbegabi @ 2005-02-03T20:21:00

2005-02-04T03:36:19Z

I'm really happy right nowww.
and i like ittt :]

I love ashley.
I love chelsea. both.
I love beau.
I love emily.
I love Morgan
I love kaitlyn
I love taco bell.
I love the computer
I love my family
I love being stupid
I love laughing.
I love peeing my pants
I love sitting in my room and doing nothing with ashley for like five hours
I love dr.pepper
I love staying home on school days
I love myspace
I love livejournal
I love looking stupid
I love walking to the store after taking a shower wearing gold shoes and green sweat pants to get hair dye
I love my cell phone
I love music
I love burping
I love the feeling you get when your trying not to cry when my face burns
I love being ugly
I love bahama bucks
I love running with ashley back from beaus house in the freezing cold and then i can feel my heart beat in my butt

heythisbegabi @ 2005-01-30T15:17:00

2005-01-30T22:32:01Z

[Friiiday.]
was a half day. i went home. and fell asleep ashley came over and since no one was home and i was asleep no one answered the door. haha. but she came back. thennn we just sat around my house. me and ashley have so much fun doing nothing at all. i dont know why. but i have more fun with her than anyone. and we dont even do anything. well then me and ashley went to jakes pizza with Beau, miguel, and keivon. and this huge guy came over and asked us if we threw ice at his girlfriend. but he was really scary. haha. thenn we went to my house. and then chris cox came over. and we watched a movie, herby actually. then everyone went home.

[Satttturday.]
Me and ashley woke up. walked in the rainnnn to taco bellll. that was fun. then came home. went to sleep. woke up, got ready. then cleaned my whole house. then beau came over. and then chris came over. then beaus mom took us to bahama bucks. thenn we came back to my house. beau went home. then me and ashley and chris sat in my room and did pretty much nothing. then ashley left. and then chris left a little bit after that. then i felt like i was going to dieee. so i went to sleep.

and today is sunday. its pretty boring. i have slept all dayyy. so im not tired anymore. im always tired too so it feels nice. haha. im moving soooon, yessss. lakjdsfioasdf. well. i dont have anything left to say.

commmment?

heythisbegabi @ 2005-01-21T22:50:00

2005-01-22T06:03:47Z

well. i havent updated in quite a while. probobly cause im never on the computer. umm. whats new. this semester is so gay. there is nothing good about it. haha. all my fun classes are gone. and they are all boring.

the saddest thing happend today. my grandma went to the doctor cause she thought she had strep throat. well they found out she had something wrong with her boob. so they told her she had to get surgery and take it off. and my grandpa is the person that puts people asleep. and he accidently killed her. lkajsoif. yeah.

my other grandma has cancer and is moving out here with my family cause her husband (other grandpa) died a little while ago and shes all alone. and she has three months to live or something.

oh yeah. and my little brother has to go live with his dad more than he lives with us. theres a long story behind that but yeah. dont want to go into that.

so basically the only things that make me happy are:
ASHLEY CHELSEA KAITLYN EMILY AND BEAU.
yeah. thats good enough for me:]

aslkdfjasoidf. stomach ache.
bye

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-24T15:09:00

2004-12-24T22:17:11Z

well. my mom got my report card and i have a D. So i have to pick if i want to do homeschooling. or if i dont get to be on the computer for a whole semester. at first i said i wouldnt be on the computer. but now i dont know. i used to like going to school. but i dont know everything changed. I dont know what to doooooooooo.

I'm sick. I think i have strep throat or something like that. so im going to go to the doctor in a few minutes.

my grandma has cancer.

um. im in love with you.

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-21T18:17:00

2004-12-22T01:33:40Z

well. this break has been fun so far. saturday night me and ashley went over to beaus and keivon alyssa miguel jordy emily gunnar. we just hung out. sunday night me and ashley went to beaus and then we just hung out and then went to target and got smoothie things and toaster struddles and then my mom made us come home, so we didnt get to watch a movie which we had planned. so then next day me and ashley get ready and then have to sit around five. and then we go to the mall. then come home and go to beaus again. when we got there it was just beau and miguel. but then all these other people came. eh. then we went to mcdonalds. then went back to beaus. and we went in the back yard. so we had to climb over walls and stuff. yeah. i was in a skirt. haha. hm. then we went home. then me and ashley went out to the jacuzzi. then beau and miguel came out there. then like the whole world came. then beau and miguel left. then me and ashley went home and sat at the computer and said stupid stuff and laughed really hard. I LOVE ASHLEY JENNIFER SCOW. goodness gracious.

I HATE people that lie. someone just lied to me. that really hurt my feelings faggot. I'm sorry if i have ever lied to anyone. I'm sorry if ive ever been mean to anyone too. or if i have ever talked bad about anyone. or if i have ever hurt anyones feelings or anything.

so tonight kaitlyns coming over, or im going over there? im not sure yet. i miss her, so this should be funnnn.

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-14T20:20:00

2004-12-15T03:28:10Z

I HAVE TO HAVE FIFTH HOUR LUNCH.

alksdjfoiabadb.

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-11T09:12:00

2004-12-11T16:24:27Z

last night was realllly fun. i went to ashleys. we got ready and then we went to chelsea bjerks. gunnar was wearing the funniest thing i have ever seen. emily and chelsea were there. then we ate, and everyone kept making fun of my laugh. it was sad. then we went over to beaus house. at first it was really boring but then we went outside and me and chelsea bjerk did our walks. it was funnnn. then ashley joined in. haha. then jordy came. so it was me chelsea haines ashley chelsea bjerk emily keivon jesse gunnar beau miguel and jordy. then me and emily rode on the lakeside gate things. hahah it was so fun i almost peed my pants. then me and emily put on beaus sweatshirts. mine was tiny. then me and emily just watched beau play keyboard for a while. haha. G G G G-unit. hahahahahahahhahaha. then we all sat down and talked for like 45 minutes. haha then chelsea bjerks mom came and got us and took us home.

today is going to suck tho. aghhgasldkfjioiioosadf. real bad. and then tomorrow, is sunday. so this weekend is going to suck. but at least yesterday was funny.

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-09T16:43:00

2004-12-09T23:52:52Z

hmm todayyyy was good i guess.

i woke up at arsh's house. got ready went to school.

i liked tomas's jacket today. hhaa

me and chelsea bjerk were hyper like all day. it was fun.

i wore tomas's glasses all day i felt so awesome.

i love chelsea bjerk. haha. and i love the drawings we drew on each others hands.

hmm. well, i guess i like someone? i dont know. no one EVER likes me so im not even going to say anything about it.

i hate this one person so much that i wish we were friends? i dont think that makes sense, but it does to me.

im going to try and get fat, starting tomorrow.

i peed my pants at ashleys house :]

well im so bored. im going to go try and find something to do i guess.

:[. gosha lkdsjfoiasjdalkfdj o

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-06T13:29:00

2004-12-06T20:49:28Z

hmm; well im at home todayyyy.

im anemic, and i stopped taking my pills a few months ago, and i thot i was better. but i guess not. i can barely walk. it suckssss. whenever i get up i almost fall over so i have to sit back down. its feels so wierd. haha. its kinda fun. i fell down the stairs this morning.

friday: i went home with chelsea bjerk and chelsea haines came too. then we got ashley and went to taco bell. ate then walked to panda. then went back to chelseas. hahahaha me and ashley and emily were in her gameroom and the doorbell rang and it scared us so bad emily flew back and tried to sit down and fell it was the funniest thing i have ever seen. hahahahhahahahahahahha. i trinkled my pants. then i burnt jordys head with the straightener then we went to the mall. surprised tomas. ate pretzels. hmm thats about it. then i spent the night at ashleys. haha. did nothing but had alot of fun.

saturday: i went home in the morning cuz ashley had to work at the carnival, so then i went to sleep. woke up at 5:30. called ashley, went over to her house. i looked cute. hahahaha jkkkkk. then her sisters were like attacking me. they were tickling me and like pulling my chair back so i fell backwards like 100 times. then me and ashley ate toaster struddles. we wrote i love beau on it and took a picture of it for him. but i accidently erased it :[[[.

sunday: umm. came home slept all day, watched spiderman. then went to church. i think that was the only time i actually listened in church it was pretty awesome. then i came home ate and went to sleep.

well this is a long entry. but im realllly boreeeed.

heythisbegabi @ 2004-12-02T18:33:00

2004-12-03T01:42:53Z

Today was great. I woke up at ashleys. and got ready fast. then went to school. i got there at the two minute bell so i was late to dance. so i didnt have to dress out. the whole dance hour we were talking about boobs. hahahhaha. gosh. then second hour. boring. third hour, i had a test. fourth hour. was pretty fun. its art and chelsea bjerk is in there so its funnn. then lunch. haha its so fun when tomas stays. hes a funny kid. and him and chelsea are the cutest thing i think i have ever seen. we just talked about throwing up and stuff like that. sixth hour, clothing i got alot done again. seventh hour, science it was boring. i dont even know why my day was so fun. but it just was. wellllllllll. tomorrows a half day. what is everyone doing? i think im hanging out with chelsea chelsea ashley emily morgan something like that. i dont even know. i was noticing im too cautious. like i never do anything. and im going to start taking more chances. laskdjfiom. hma.sdkjfloo. bahha.fsdfk :]

hmm well. im going to go get my stuff from ashleys. bye.